Don’t Just Chase a Title: Real Goal Setting for the Long Haul
By Carlos — Boxing coach. East LA. Reads Marcus Aurelius. Been through it all. ·
I was seventeen when Rudy dragged me out of a holding cell in Hollenbeck. I thought my life was destined to be a revolving door of bad decisions and concrete walls. I was angry, I was fast, and I was headed nowhere fast. Rudy didn’t ask me what my 'five-year plan' was. He shoved a mouthpiece in my face, wrapped my hands, and told me to punch the bag until I stopped shaking.
That was the day I started setting goals. Not the kind they talk about in those corporate seminars where you make a vision board and hope for the best. I’m talking about the kind that keeps you alive when the world tries to break your ribs.
The Philosophy of the Jab
I’ve been reading Marcus Aurelius for thirty years now. The guy sat in a tent on the edge of the Roman Empire, fighting wars, and still managed to write about keeping your head straight. He once said, 'The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.'
In the ring, if you’re obsessed with the knockout in the first round, you’re going to get countered and put on your back. You start looking for the big win, you stop paying attention to your footing. Goal setting is the same. You don’t win a fight with a dream; you win it with a jab, a movement, and a defensive slip. You focus on the task right in front of your nose, and the rest takes care of itself.
Stop Setting 'Outcome' Goals
Most people come into my gym in East LA saying, 'Carlos, I want to be a professional fighter.' That’s not a goal. That’s a fantasy. A goal is something you control. You can’t control whether the judges like your style, or if a promoter is having a bad day, or if you catch a bad break with an injury—believe me, I know about the injury part.
Instead of chasing an outcome, set 'process' goals. If you want to lose weight, don’t set a goal to 'lose 20 pounds.' Set a goal to walk through the door of the gym four days a week, no matter how tired you are. If you want to get a promotion, don’t set a goal to 'get the title.' Set a goal to master one new skill or improve your communication on the job every single week. Control the inputs, and the outputs will follow like a shadow.
The 'Boyle Heights' Filter
Living where I live, you see people get distracted by shiny things. They want the fast car, the status, the quick fix. But the street doesn’t reward shortcuts. When you’re setting your goals, run them through a filter. Ask yourself: 'Does this goal make me a more disciplined, more grounded human being, or is it just ego?'
If your goal is just to show off, you’ll quit when it gets hard. When you’re at 5:00 AM, the gym is freezing, your lungs are burning, and you’re wondering why you’re doing this—that’s when the 'why' matters. If your goal isn’t rooted in character, you’ll fold.
Actionable Steps to Reset Your Focus
If you’re feeling stuck, stop looking at the horizon. Look at your feet. Here is what I tell the kids at the nonprofit:
1. The 24-Hour Rule: Don’t worry about next year. What can you do today that makes tomorrow 1% better? Maybe it’s making one more sales call, reading one chapter of a book, or hitting the heavy bag for twenty minutes. Small wins build momentum.
2. Identify Your 'Rudy': Who is keeping you accountable? You don't need a coach, but you do need someone who will tell you the truth. If you tell your friends you're going to do something, find someone who will check in on you.
3. Audit Your Environment: If you’re trying to change your life but hanging out with the same people who keep you stagnant, you’re fighting with your hands tied behind your back. Change your scenery.
4. Write it Down, Then Burn it: I like to write my daily intentions on a piece of paper, look at them, and then get to work. Don’t obsess over the paper. The paper isn’t the work. The sweat is the work.
The Long Game
I’m 55 now. I’ve seen guys come and go. The ones who stick around aren’t the loudest or the most talented. They’re the ones who show up when they don’t want to. They treat their goals like a boxer treats a training camp: it’s a commitment to the process, not just the night under the bright lights.
Life is going to hit you. It hits harder than any heavyweight I ever faced. But if you have your goals anchored in your character rather than your ego, you won’t just survive—you’ll learn to love the fight.
So, what’s your jab for tomorrow? What’s the one small, boring, necessary thing you’re going to do to get better? Don’t overthink it. Just put your wraps on and get to work.
If you’re feeling like you’re shadowboxing in the dark and need someone to help you frame your next move, come find me. My door at the gym is always open, and I’ve got plenty of coffee. Let’s talk about it.